Your Favourite Rock Artist...According To Your Horoscope

Looking Up

One of our favourite pastimes on the Drive Home Show is looking up to the stars in wonder & to see all the major celestial events. It's been a busy month so far, with several reasons to look up and marvel. But perhaps it's time to be productive with our star gazing.

Growing up, one of the more mystical aspects of my small-town radio station was listening to the morning horoscopes. But that's passé. What if we put the rock & roll spin on it to really understand ourselves & our place in the cosmos?

So, I put in the research, I've cross-referenced the personality traits of each star sign, and I've determined what rock artist best describes YOUR horoscope. Let's go!

♈ ARIES — AC/DC

You're an Aries, so naturally you don't have time for a 14-minute guitar solo, a concept album or anybody telling you to calm down. You want three chords, a massive riff and somebody yelling at you to turn it up. AC/DC is basically your astrological spirit animal: loud, confident, impatient and completely uninterested in asking permission. Aries are known for being bold, energetic and occasionally a little hot-headed. So, playing with some TNT on the Highway to Hell, while shaking All Night Long, is sooo you!

♉ TAURUS — THE ROLLING STONES

Taurus likes the finer things in life: good food, good music, comfort and absolutely not being rushed. Enter The Rolling Stones. They've been doing this their way for roughly a million years, and nobody's going to tell Mick Jagger or Keith Richards when it's time to quit. Taurus is famously stubborn, persistent and sensual, while very particular. Qualities that make the Stones a pretty natural match. You don't need the latest band. You need the band that's still going to be here when the "latest band" is a classic-rock trivia question.

♊ GEMINI — QUEEN

Gemini needs variety. You can't give them the same thing twice and expect them to stay interested. That's why Queen is your band. Hard rock? Sure. Opera? Absolutely. Piano ballad? Why not? Glam? Bring it. Freddie Mercury's theatrical, unpredictable, larger-than-life personality practically screams Gemini. You're curious, clever, talkative and easily bored, so you need a band capable of changing musical personalities before you've finished your first beer.

♋ CANCER — BRUCE SPRINGSTEEN

Cancer gets a reputation for being emotional, nostalgic and sentimental. And you know what? We're not going to fight you on that one. You're getting Bruce Springsteen. The Boss specializes in songs about home, family, old friends, lost dreams, small towns and the people we can't quite let go of. Cancer wants music that makes them feel something. You might be perfectly happy singing along to "Born to Run" with the windows down, but there's a decent chance you're going to get a little misty when the saxophone kicks in.

♌ LEO — VAN HALEN

Leo doesn't walk into a room. Leo arrives. And if there happens to be a spotlight, even better. That's Van Halen. Flashy, charismatic, ridiculously talented and completely comfortable being the center of attention. Eddie Van Halen's guitar playing wasn't just good, it was show-off good. And David Lee Roth? Please. If you're a Leo, you don't want to quietly sit in the corner listening to music. You want to be the person at the party who somehow ends up standing on the coffee table during "Jump."

♍ VIRGO — RUSH

Virgo, you overthink things. Fortunately, there's a band for that. Rush! Intricate musicianship, complicated arrangements, precision playing, ridiculously clever lyrics and enough technical detail to keep you occupied for the next 40 years. Virgo is associated with being analytical, meticulous and practical, so while everybody else is banging their head to the chorus, you're wondering how Neil Peart managed to play that drum part. And honestly? That's okay. Rush would understand.

♎ LIBRA — FLEETWOOD MAC

Libra wants harmony. Beautiful music, beautiful people, complicated relationships and just enough drama to keep things interesting. So obviously, you get Fleetwood Mac. Their music is elegant, emotional and occasionally so tangled in romantic history that you could probably use it to teach a university course. Libra is charming, relationship-oriented and drawn to beauty, which makes "Dreams" playing softly in the background while everybody stares dramatically out a window pretty much your perfect afternoon.

♏ SCORPIO — BLACK SABBATH

You're a Scorpio. You don't want sunshine and rainbows. You want the riff that sounds like something terrible is about to happen. Scorpio is intense, private, mysterious and occasionally obsessive. Black Sabbath took those exact qualities and plugged them into a Marshall stack. While everybody else was writing happy little rock songs, Sabbath was basically asking, "What if this guitar sounded like the end of civilization?" Scorpio approved.

♐ SAGITTARIUS — THE DOORS

Sagittarius is the free spirit of the zodiac. You don't like rules, you don't like being told where to go and you definitely don't like somebody telling you that you've had enough. Enter Jim Morrison and The Doors. Sagittarius is adventurous, independent, philosophical and occasionally prone to making decisions that seemed like a much better idea at the time. The Doors didn't exactly specialize in playing it safe, and neither do you. Your perfect road trip has no destination, no itinerary and probably a slightly questionable amount of gas left in the tank.

♑ CAPRICORN — LED ZEPPELIN

Capricorn is the sign that looks at a mountain and says, "Okay. How do I get to the top?" Hard-working, ambitious, disciplined and determined, you need a band with some serious horsepower. Led Zeppelin qualifies. Four musicians who could play blues, folk, hard rock and epic fantasy-inspired masterpieces; and somehow make all of it sound enormous. You appreciate greatness, Capricorn. You also appreciate earning greatness. That's why you're not listening to a band. You're listening to the greatest band in the room.

♒ AQUARIUS — DAVID BOWIE

Aquarius, you were never going to pick the obvious answer. You're independent, unconventional, inventive and just a little bit weird — and I mean that as a compliment. David Bowie didn't simply change his sound; he changed his entire identity whenever he felt like it. Ziggy Stardust? Sure. Thin White Duke? Why not? Aquarius looks at the rules and immediately wonders who wrote them and whether they can be improved. Bowie would understand.

♓ PISCES — PINK FLOYD

Pisces lives somewhere between reality and wherever their imagination happens to take them that day. So naturally, you're getting Pink Floyd. Dreamy, emotional, introspective and occasionally completely detached from reality, Floyd gives Pisces exactly what they need: music you don't just listen to...you disappear into. You aren't necessarily interested in knowing what "The Dark Side of the Moon" means. You just know that when the lights go down and that album starts playing, you're going somewhere. (I'm not a Pisces, but you can understand why I married one.)

Hit Or MIss?

There you have it, a look at the stars, connecting you to your horoscope-based bands. Did I nail it? Can you guess which sign I am? Hit us up on facebook to weigh in on the list, and keep looking up to the stars in wonder!